They Have a Tool for That

When Madeline was 2, she was playing with her dress-ups and broke a strand of beads, and then proceeded to stick one of them up her nose. Turns out kids nostrils are quite small and it is hard to get things out that they get in. We ended up at the Instacare and I was wondering how they were going to get this lodged bead out of the nose. Well the doctor said, "We have a tool for that." I said, "You have a tool to get things out of kids' noses?" I was impressed it was kind of a thin crochet hook looking thing with a small hook on the end. He stuck it up and the bead popped right out. It was rather impressive. I asked to keep the hook so when she stuck another up later that night, I could pop it out myself.

I needed that hook today. Max (also 2 - no wonder these 2-year-olds get such a bad rap), came up to me and said he had something up his nose. I asked what and he said an eraser. Sure enough, my mechanical pencil on my desk had the eraser missing, and a quick glance up his nose verified this. I tried to perform a surgical extraction with a variety of small objects with no luck. I wasn't too worried because I knew about the special tool that doctors have. The doctor told us to come right in, as it needed to be removed promptly. The doctor looked at the wedged eraser and said she would be back with her tool. I knew what she was talking about, as I am experienced with nose stuffers. Well, she came back into the room with a paper clip that she had formed into a special tool, similar to the handy hook and proceeded to shove the paperclip up my son's nose and fish around. To his credit, Max laid still with his eyes red and watery while she prodded around and at last the bloody mass of eraser was removed.

One funny moment while we were waiting for the doctor, we were up on the fourth floor with a big window. We were watching the cars and the people and as the people would walk up to the door, he would say, "I wonder what they have up their nose" as if we went to a special doctor where people come all day to get foreign objects out of their nose.

As a sick side note, my neighbor is a regional manager for AFLAC and sold us on having an accident plan for the family. I assume this is an accident, unless it is just considered plain stupidity (maybe I should suggest a name change for the plan). It is rather sick, as when your kids get hurt, you can profit from it. Today I earned $70 for taking Max in and who knows, if I'm lucky there may be additional pay for foreign objects or surgery with paperclips. So far this month we are raking it in (Maddie made us some big bucks as well). Yee haw.

I got a copy of the clinic note for my AFLAC claim. I type medical reports and am always interested to read what the doctor has to say. Her last sentence on the plan reads "Patient counseled regarding not putting things in his nose, to which he agrees." Huh? I missed that little discussion they had I guess.

Finally, I would like to pay special tribute to Sam. I'm sure there was many a time when he had various treasures in the palm of his hand that were just calling out to be shoved up his nose. He was somehow able to resist this temptation time and time again. Tonight, I tip my hat to Sam.